One of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn in motherhood is that perfection isn’t the goal–and that trying to be a “perfect mom” only wears me down. With a teen juggling competitive cheerleading and homeschooling responsibilities pulling at every moment of the day, I’ve had to be realistic.
Some days, dinner is cereal for everyone, the laundry piles up, and the house isn’t magazine–ready–and that’s okay. What matters most is showing up with love and intentionality, not flawless execution. When I let go of impossible standards, I find more peace, and even my relationships with my daughter and family feel more genuine.
I’m learning that being “good enough” means being present, listening, cheering on those small wins, and forgiving myself on the hard days. Motherhood is imperfect, messy, joyful, and beautiful–and embracing that truth fully has been a gift worth giving myself.
If you’ve struggled with perfectionism as a mom, remember– you are enough, just as you are. How do you practice grace with yourself? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments.
Sometimes motherhood feels like a beautiful mess–a constant balancing act of love, chaos, challenges, and little victories. I want to share a little about where I am right now in my journey and how I’ve learned to find joy even in the busiest seasons.
As a mom of a teen cheerleader who competes nearly every weekend, and with homeschooling responsibilities, life is anything but quiet. Some days, the calendar feels overwhelming, and the to do list seems never-ending. But over time, I’ve realized that joy isn’t about perfection or “having it all together.” It’s about embracing the messy, unscripted moments and finding gratitude in the little things.
One way I stay grounded is by carving out small pockets of self-care–sometimes just five minutes to breathe, pray, or savor a warm cup of tea. I’ve also discovered that involving my daughter in simple family traditions, like sharing what we’re thankful for or cooking a quick meal together, connects us in a meaningful way despite the hustle.
Encouraging my teen in her dreams, celebrating her progress, and reminding her (and myself) that rest is part of winning has been a balancing act I’m still learning. What’s helped me most is leaning into communitiy–connecting with other moms who get it, sharing our stories, and knowing I’m not alone.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed or like you’re just “surviving” motherhood right now, I want you to know you’re doing an amazing job. Joy isn’t a destination; it’s a choice we make every day in how we show up for ourselves and our families.
Thank you for being part of this community. I hope to share more encouragement, real talk, and helpful tips here as we navigate motherhood together.
What small moments bring joy in your busy days? I’d love to hear in the comments below.
With love,
Maria
Enjoying the northern lights by the lake very peaceful
Thanksgiving is a special time to pause, reflect, and gather with family, but as our children grow into teens and adults, the way we celebrate often needs to evolve. Creating inclusive, heartfelt Thanksgiving Traditions that invite participation from everyone- from teens to grown children-builds lasting memories and strengthens family bonds. Here are some ideas to inspire your family’s Thanksgiving this year and beyond.
Share Gratitude Together
Begin your Thanksgiving celebration by creating a “Gratitude Sharing Circle.” Invite each person to share something they are thankful for this year. To add a creative twist, pass around a “gratitude basket” where each family member can drop a note before reading it aloud. This practice encourages reflection across generations and reminds everyone of the blessings in life, fostering connection around shared appreciation.
Cook and Swap Recipes as a Team
Involve every family member in preparing the Thanksgiving meal. Teens and adults can each take responsibility for a dish- perhaps one that represents their heritage or a personal favorite. Hosting a recipe swap or cooking together provides a hands-on way to collaborate, share family culinary traditions, and create new ones. This transforms meal prep into a joyful, communal activity.
Tell Stories or Keep a Thanksgiving Journal
Create Space for storytelling by inviting family members to count cherished Thanksgiving memories or funny holiday moments. Alternatively, begin a “Thanksgiving Journal” where everyone writes or draws reflections about the day. Collecting these yearly entries builds a priceless keepsake that celebrates your family’s journey and grows richer with each holiday.
Give Back Through Family Volunteering
Fostering gratitude often deepens when we give back. Consider organizing a family volunteer project around Thanksgiving-whether serving at a local food bank, donating supplies, or helping neighbors. Volunteering together nurtures a shared sense of purpose and reminds everyone of the importance of generosity and community.
Play Together: Games and Trivia
After the meal, gather for a Thanksgiving-themed game or trivia session. Incorporate fun facts about the holiday, family history questions, or playful challenges that include everyone. Games are a lively way for teens and adults to laugh, compete lightly, and deepen connections beyond the dinner table.
Collaborate on a Thanksgiving Blessing of Prayer
Invite each family member to contribute a line to a collective Thanksgiving blessing or prayer to be read aloud before the meal. This ritual creates spiritual connection and honors the meaning of the holiday while giving voice to diverse perspectives in your family.
Crafting to Celebrate the Season
Setting up a seasonal craft station engages creativity for all ages. Making decorations, gratitude leaves, or personalized place cards can decorate your home and table with meaningful symbols. These tangible creations add beauty and Purpose to the celebration and offer a relaxing activity to enjoy together.
Take a Reflective Walk Outdoors
End your Thanksgiving with a calming outdoor walk, allowing time for each person to share thoughts on gratitude, hopes, or reflections on the day. Connecting with nature provides peace and fosters heartfelt conversation, renewing family bonds and individual well-being.
Thanksgiving is more than a meal-it’s an opportunity to weave together love, gratitude, and joy that spans generations. By cultivating traditions that honor everyone’s participation and respect the unique rhythms of teens and adult children, you create a foundation of meaningful memories that your family will cherish forever.
What are some ways your family celebrates Thanksgiving together: Share your traditions below-I’d love to hear your stories!
Fall is a season filled with vibrant colors, crisp air, and cozy traditions-but for busy moms of competition cheerleaders, or football games etc, it can also be a whirlwind of practices, games, and weekend competitions. Balancing the demands of cheer season or other sports with savoring fall’s unique joys can feel overwhelming, yet with a few strategies, it’s possible to embrace the season fully while starting grounded and joyful.
1.Embrace Small Fall Moments
You don’t need a full day to revel in the magic of fall. Look for simple, bite-sized ways to soak in autumn’s beauty: a quick morning walk in a nearby park to admire the changing leaves, a cup of warm apple cider on a chilly evening, or a few minutes lighting pumpkin-scented candle. These small acts help you pause and appreciate the season Amid your busy schedule.
2.Make Fall Traditions Adaptable
Create family rituals that don’t require a lot of time but carry meaningful connection. This could be baking a batch of pumpkin muffins together on a weekday evening, quick carving of mini-pumpkins, or a short gratitude circle before meals that include a fall-inspired theme. Flexibility is key-these traditions can easily adjust around cheer practice and competition times or sports times.
3.Plan Ahead and Prioritize Self-Care
Map out your week early with cheer commitments etc and pencil in intentional self-care. Whether it’s five minutes of deep breathing, a 10 minute stretch session, or a quick chat with a friend, small pockets of care help recharge your energy. Keeping a reusable water bottle and healthy snacks in your bag supports wellness on the go.
4.Engage Your Cheerleader or Athlete in Fall Fun
Invite your teen to join quick fall activities that relax and restore, like a nature walk to collect colorful leaves or a scenic drive to enjoy fall foliage between competitions and games. Sharing these brief moments can refresh both your spirits without adding stress.
5. Use Travel Time Wisely
Competitions usually mean time in the care or bus. Turn these travel moments into mini bonding times with your teen through favorite playlists, lighthearted conversations, or shared podcasts about motivation and wellness. These moments help you stay connected despite a hectic schedule.
6.Celebrate Wins and Progress
Amid the rush, celebrate victories-big or small- with your cheerleader or athlete. Whether it’s mastering a new stunt or completing a tough routine, a little recognition or a cozy reward ties back to enjoying the season you’re in.
Fall with a competition cheerleader or athlete is a balancing act, but it can also be a beautiful season full of growth, connection, and gratitude. With intentional pauses to enjoy the essence of fall, flexible traditions, and mindful self-care, you can thrive in the cheer or game season-and savor the magic of the season as well.
Family traditions are much more than just rituals; they are the heartbeats of our family story, weaving together moments of love, laughter, and connection that echo through generations. In a busy world, creating meaningful family, traditions grounds us, gives a sense of belonging, and builds treasured memories that last a lifetime.
Why Family Traditions Matter
Traditions strengthen family bonds and create a feeling of stability and identity. They teach children about their heritage and values while giving every family member a chance to contribute to something bigger than themselves. Especially during challenging seasons of life, traditions offer comforting consistency and joy.
How to Start Traditions That Last
1.Reflect on Your Family’s Values:
Think about what matters most to your family. Is it faith, creativity, kindness, fun, adventure, or something else? Your traditions should reflect these core values to feel authentic and inspire engagement.
2. Involve Everyone-Even Teens:
Get input from all family members, including teens and young children. Teens often crave independence but still want connection, so invite their ideas on what feels meaningful or fun. Young children may enjoy hands-on activities or helping plan. This shared ownership builds excitement and long-term commitment.
3.Begin Small and Simple:
Start with easy, repeatable rituals, like a weekly family movie night, monthly outdoor adventure, or a special meal like Sunday pancakes. Simple traditions can grow naturally over time into larger customs.
4.Blend Fun and Purpose:
Aim for traditions that bring joy but also align with your family’s values. Volunteering together during holidays, planting a garden as a family project, or hosting a storytelling night where everyone shares a favorite memory creates both fun and meaning.
5.Use Food and Rituals:
Food is a timeless tradition builder. Whether it’s a signature recipe, a holiday bake-off, or sharing a favorite snack during storytime, these moments of sharing nourish both body and soul.
6. Create Space for Emotional Sharing:
Encourgrage conversations about gratitude, dreams, and challenges as part of your traditions. This emotional connection is the glue that makes traditions unforgettable and meaningful.
Tips for Teens and Kids
For Teens: Involve them in co-creating the traditions. Let them pick themes or activities, host events, or take charge of music and decorations. This respect for their growing independence makes traditions more engaging.
For Young Kids: Use crafts, songs, and storytelling to make traditions memorable and fun. Let them help with simple tasks to feel included.
The Gift of Traditions
Family traditions are living legacies, evolving as your family grows but always carrying the threads of love and connection. When crafted with intention and inclusivity, they become the memories your children and grandchildren will cherish forever.
Motherhood is a journey full of joys, challenges, and profound moments of growth-not only for our daughters but for us as moms as well. One of our most important roles as mothers is to nurture our daughters’ dreams and independence, empowering them to become confident, capable women. This blog post explores meaningful ways to encourage your daughter’s dreams while gently guiding her toward independence in today’s world.
Embrace Her Unique Dreams Without Judgement
Every daughter’s dreams are a reflection of her unique spirit and passions. Celebrate her ideas, no matter how big or small. Whether she dreams of becoming an artist, scientist, entrepreneur, or something entirely unexpected, your enthusiastic support lays a strong foundation for her confidence. Listen actively to her aspirations, ask thoughtful questions, and share your own stories about following your dreams to create a bond of mutual encouragement.
Foster Independence Through Trust and Responsibility
Independence grows in the soil of trust and responsibility. Give your daughter opportunities to make age-appropriate choices, from managing daily tasks to setting goal. This builds her decision-making skills and self-reliance. Encourage her to face challenges with resilience by praising her efforts, not just outcomes. When she knows you believe in her ability to solve problems, she develops the courage she needs to pursue her dreams boldly.
Support Her Education And Curiosity
Encourage a love of learning by supporting your daughter’s education and curiosity. Engage in activities that spark creativity and critical thinking. Provide books, resources, and experiences that broaden her horizons and inspire determination. Celebrate her achievements academically and beyond-recognize the value of growth in every area of life as part of her journey toward independence.
Model Confidence and Self-Worth
Your daughter learns by watching you. Model confidence, self-worth, and healthy boundaries in your own life. Show her that it’s okay to take risks, make mistakes, and grow from them. When she sees you prioritize your own dreams and well-being, she internalizes that her own aspirations deserve respect and attention.
Create a Safe Space for Open Communication
An open, safe space for dialogue strengthens your relationship and her ability to navigate independence. Encourage honest conversations about fears, challenges, and dreams without judgment. Being her confidante and sounding board means she can approach life’s hurdles knowing she has unwavering support.
Her Her Build a Supportive Community
Friendships and mentors play vital roles in sustaining dreams and independence. Encourage your daughter to seek out positive role models, supportive friends, and groups where she feels inspired and valued. A strong community uplifts her spirit, provides guidance, and broadens her understanding of what’s possible.
Conclusion: Empowerment is a Gift Yo Give Through Love
Encouraging your daughter’s dreams and independence is a beautiful act of love that shapes her future. By embracing her passions, trusting her decisions, supporting her curiosity, modeling self-confidence, communicating openly, and fostering a community, you gift her the tools to soar. As you invest in her journey, you also-grow-discovering the profound joy of watching her transform into a strong, independent woman ready to shine.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re speaking a different language than the teenager in your life, you are definitely not alone. The adolescent years, are a whirlwind of brain development, identity formation, and a heightened focus on peer connections. This often means that the lines of communication with adults can feel strained, or even non-existent.
But there’s the good news: while it might take a different approach, meaningful communication with your teen is absolutely possible and incredibly vital. It builds trust, fosters understanding, and keeps those crucial lines of support open.
The Teen Communication Playbook: What Works ( and What Doesn’t)
Let’s ditch the frustration and embrace some strategies that genuinely help bridge the gap.
1.Listen More Than You Talk(Really!):
This is perhaps the most crucial tip. Teens often feel unheard or misunderstood. When they do speak, resist the urge to immediately jump in with advice, lectures, or solutions.
Try This: Practice active listening. Nod,make eye contact,and use phrases like, “It sounds like you’re feeling [emotion]” or “So, if I’m understanding you correctly, [paraphrase what they said]?” This shows you’re engaged and trying to understand their perspective.
Avoid This: Interrogating them with a barrage of questions or cutting them off your opinion.
2. Choose Your Moments Wisely:
Teens aren’t always ready for a deep conversation on demand. The best opportunities often arise organically.
Try This: Look for “side-by-side” moments. In the car, while cooking together, on a walk, or even just before bedtime when defenses are lower. These less direct settings can feel less confrontational.
Avoid This: Cornering them the moment they walk in the door or when they’re engrossed in something important to them (like gaming or homework).
3. Be Present and Put Down Your Phone ( and Expect the Same):
it’s hard to connect when you’re distracted. Model the behavior you want to see.
Try This: When your teen starts talking, even if it’s about something seemingly trivial, make eye contact and give them your full attention. Ask them to do the same when you need to talk.
Avoid This: Trying to have a serious conversation while scrolling through social media or doing chores.
4.Validate Their Feelings, Even if You Don’t Understand Their Logic:
Their emotional brains are in high gear. Dismissing their feelings invalidates their experience.
Try This: “I c”an see why you’d be upset about that,” or “That sounds really frustrating.” You don’t have to agree with their actions, but acknowledging their emotions is powerful.
Avoid This: “That’s ridiculous,” “You’re overreacting,” or “When I was your age…”
5.Keep it Brief and Specific:
Teen attention spans can be short, especially for lectures. Get to the point.
Try This: Instead of a 20- minute monologue about chores, try, “Hey, about the dishes, could you please get them done before dinner tonight?”
Avoid This: Ranting about all their past missteps or launching into a general “you never…” or “you always…” speech.
6.Offer Choice and Collaboration( When Possible):
Teens crave autonomy. Giving them a say, even in small things, can increase cooperation.
Try This: “What do you think is a fair consequence for missing curfew?” or “What’s the best way for us to tackle this?”
Avoid This:Dictating every rule without any room for discussion or input.
7.Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff; Pick Your Battles:
Not every eye-roll or grunt requires a full disciplinary action. Sometimes,ignoring minor provocations can preserve energy for bigger issues.
Try This: Focus on core values and safety. Let some of the fashion choices or room tidiness (within reason) slide if it means preserving your relationship.
Avoid This: Engaging in power struggles over every single minor infection.
8.Apologize When You Mess Up:
You’re human. You’ll lose your cool. Admitting your mistakes shows humility and models healthy conflict resolution.
Try This: “I’m sorry I yelled earlier. I was frustrated, but that wasn’t fair to you to you.”
Avoid This: Pretending you’re always right or refusing to acknowledge your own errors.
9.Show Genuine Interest in Their World:
Even if you don’t understand TikTok dances or their favorite video game, asking about it can open doors.
Try This: “Tell me about that game you’re playing,” or “What’s a new song you’ve been listening to?”
Avoid This: Dismissing their interests as “silly” or “a waste of time.”
Communication with teenagers is a journey, not a destination. There will be good days and challenging ones. But by approaching these conversations with patience, respect, and a willingness to truly listen, you can foster a stronger, more open relationship that will benefit you both for years to come. What’s one small step you can take today to connect with your teen?
Raising teenagers presents a unique set of challenges, and as a mom, prioritizing self-care is essential for navigating this demanding phrase. It’s easy to get caught up in their world of independence, peer pressure, and evolving identities, but remember the pre-flight safety demonstration: you need your own oxygen mask first.
Here are some key aspects of self-care tailored for moms of teens, drawing from various helpful blogs:
Understanding the Landscape:
-Teenage Development: Recognize that the emotional rollercoaster, mood swings, and desire for independence are normal parts of adolescence. Understanding these developmental shifts can help you respond with more patience and empathy.
-Communication Shifts: Teens may become more withdrawn, and open dialogue can feel challenging. Patience and creating a non-judgmental space are crucial for them to feel comfortable sharing.
-Increased Stress: Parenting teens can be a significant source of stress due to academic pressures, social media influencers, and the need to establish new boundaries.
Prioritizing Your Well-being:
Time for Yourself: Carve out-even small pockets of time each day for activities that replenish you. This could be reading, walking, a quiet cup of coffee, or pursuing a hobby. It’s not selfish; it’s essential for your overall welll-being
Set Boundaries: Just as you help your teens establish healthy boundaries, set your own. Learn to say no to commitments that drain you and protect your time and energy.
-Nourish Your Body: Pay attention to your physical health through balanced eating, regular exercise, and sufficient sleep. These form the foundation for managing stress and maintaining energy.
Connect with Others: Invest in you support network. Whether it’s friends, other parents, or a support group, having people to share experiences and gain perspective from can make a significant difference.
-Mindfulness Practices: Techniques like meditation and deep breathing exercises can help you stay present, manage stress, and respond more calmly to challenging situations.
Let Go of Guilt: Remind yourself that prioritizing your well-being is not selfish. A well-cared- for parent is better equipped to support their children.
Navigating the Teen Years with Self-Care:
-Listen Without Judgement: When your teen does open up, resist the urge to immediately offer solutions. Instead, focus on listening and validating their feelings.
-Model Vulnerability: Your teens don’t need a perfect parent; they need a real one. Sharing your own experiences(appropriately) can help them feel less alone in their struggles
-Redefine Success: Shift your focus from perfection to progress, both for yourself and your teen. Celebrate small wins and acknowledge the effort involved in navigating this stage.
Seek Professional Help When Needed: Don’t hesitate to reach out to a therapist or counselor if you’re feeling overwhelmed or struggling to cope.
Remember, self-care is an ongoing process, not a one-time fix. By intentionally prioritizing your well-being, you’ll not only be better equipped to navigate the challenges of raising teenagers but also model healthy habits for your children. You deserve to thrive, and taking care of yourself is a crucial step in that direction.
Ah, the teenage years! A time of growth, change, and sometimes a bit of angst. Here are 10 things your teenage daughter could really benefit from hearing from you:
1.”I love you unconditionally.” This might seem obvious, but hearing it explicitly, especially when she feels she’s messed up or you’re disagreeing, can be incredibly grounding.
2.”It’s okay to make mistakes. That’s how we learn.” Taking the pressure off perfection allows her to try new things and not be paralyzed by the fear of failure. Share some of your own mistakes and what you learned from them.
3.”Your feelings are valid.” Even if you don’t understand why she’s upset or frustrated, acknowledging her emotions helps her feel heard and understood. You can say something like, “I hear that you’re really upset about this.”
4. ” You are strong and capable.” Teenagers often face new challenges and can doubt their abilities. Reminding her of her inner strength and past successes can boost her confidence.
5.”I’m here for you, no matter what.” Knowing she has a safe space to turn to, without judgment, is crucial. Let her know you’re constant in her life.
6. It’s important to be true to yourself.” The pressure to fit in can immense during adolescence. Encourage her to value her individuality and make choices that align with her own values.
7. “Your voice matters.” Encourage her to express her opinions and stand up for what she believes in, respectfully. This empowers her and helps her develop her own identity.
8.”You are beautiful inside and out.” In a world saturated with often unrealistic beauty standards, remind her that her worth comes from within and that true beauty encompasses kindness, intelligence, and character.
9.”I’m proud of the person you are becoming.” Acknowledging her growth and positive qualities can be a huge motivator and source of encouragement. Focus on her efforts and character, not just achievements.
10. “Let’s talk.” Regularly creating opportunities for open and honest conversation, even about the small things, builds connection and trust. Show genuine interest in her life and listen more than you talk.
These simple phrases, spoken with sincerity, can make a world of difference in your teenage daughter’s life. They build foundation of love, trust, and support that will help her navigate the challenges and joys of adolescence.
When our children are little, it’s easy to see how much they need us. They cling to our legs, reach for our hands, cry for us in the middle of the night. But when they become teenagers, the need becomes harder to read. They pull away, seek independence, shut their bedroom doors, and suddenly we wonder-do they still need me like they used to?
The answer is yes. More then ever.
They may not say it. They may roll their eyes, challenge our boundaries, or act like they’ve outgrown us. But teenagers still need their moms. They just need us quieter, deeper ways.
The Power of Simply Being Home
In the teen years, life becomes complicated. Their bodies are changing. Their social worlds are shifting. Their emotions are unpredictable. And while they’re pushing for independence, they’re also craving security-the kind that doesn’t shout, but stays steady in the background.
When a mom is home-not just physically, but emotionally present-it creates an anchor in a world that often feels like it’s moving too fast for them to keep up.
It might be:
Being there when they walk in from school, even if they barely say a word.
Making their favorite meal after a long day, without expecting conversation.
Sitting on the couch nearby while they scroll on their phone- just so they know you’re close.
Emotional Availability Matters
Teens go through big things-friendship drama, identity questions, academic stress, heartbreak, anxiety, temptation. And they don’t always come to you right away. But when they do, they need to know you’re there. That they don’t have to schedule your attention. That your emotional availability isn’t running on empty.
Sometime it’s at 10 p.m. when they finally want to talk. Or in the car. Or during a commercial. Those moments come unexpectedly-and when we’re home, we’re more likely to catch them.
It’s Not About Hovering-It’s About Presence
Staying at home during the teen years doesn’t mean micromanaging or being a helicopter parent. It means being a safe, steady presence in the midst of their emotional storm. Teens don’t need us to fix everything. They need to know we see them, hear them, and love them-without judgment or agenda.
If You’re a Stay-at-Home Mom to a Teen: You Matter
In a culture that often measures value by income or productivity, choosing to stay home during the teen years might feels invisible. But it’s not. What you’re doing matters deeply-even if it’s in quiet, behind-the-scenes ways.
You’re the one who keeps the fridge stocked with their favorite snacks. You’re the one who notices when they seem “off”. You’re the one they’ll come to when the world feels too big.
And one day, when they look back, they might not remember every detail-but they’ll remember how it felt to have you there.
A Final Thought
Teenagers don’t stop needing their moms- they just need us differently. More quietly. More steadily. More patiently. And being home during this chapter of their lives is a powerful gift you can give them.
Even when it’s hard. Even when it goes unnoticed.
They may not always say it now, but one day, they’ll understand. And they’ll be grateful.
